Life drags on. My whole outlook on life is becoming warped by this Navy — or was it warped before the Navy ever got me? I know that this problem of marriage is due to sare me in the face one of these days. My mind tells me that it is normal and intelligent to get married (presupposing the “right girl”) but something in my (my heart?) recoils from it. The thought of being tied down to children and an aging wife — frowsy? — leaves me cold. And yet, in one’s later life, what else is there to really live for, but one’s children? O hell, I give up — let it solve itself. Wish I could hear a good symphony tonight. Beethovan’s “Pastoral” would be perfect.